Daily challenges

The challenge of navigating schizoaffective disorder and Atypical anorexia at the same time.

I must say, although my mental health is good, and my experience of well-being is great, I do still struggle with some aspects of these 2 diagnoses.

I am on anti-psychotic medication and this comes with weight challenges. Its extremely easy to gain weight, even with just a normal diet. So navigating this has meant spending much of my life  since starting the medication, on a diet.
Weight has inevitably been up and down. And over the last few years I really started to restrict and go to the gym alot. Consequently I lost alot of weight, and became obsessed with weight loss, and terrified of weight gain. An eating disorder grabbed a hold of me again. I was diagnosed with atypical anorexia which I didn’t see coming. I have moved forward over the last 6 months, working with a psychologist and dietician, and am now at a healthy weight again. But I still have to keep tabs on weight gain, which sometimes feels really unfair. Why on earth did the universe lump me with a diagnosis of schizoaffective disorder, AND aside from this, also lump me with eating disorder issues. But I do my best.

The schizoaffective disorder is not really an issue, on the more difficult days, I can struggle a bit, socially – and interpersonally. On good days, I am very confident and socialising is not an issue at all. So, i take the good with the bad, and I lean into gratitude on a daily basis. I must remind myself on the difficult days… That ive come so incredibly far in only 15 years, and I have not only mental stability, but also have a very positive sense of well-being. Not only this, but I have so many amazing people and opportunities in my life. I certainly don’t miss out on anything at all! I am incredibly blessed.

As someone who has survived a very hellish experience and come out the other side, I have to remember i am so strong and resilient after being so distressed for such a long time, I can get through the bad days with a sense of ease. Ive been through much, much worse.

So, for anyone out there reading this, if you’re struggling with your mental health, to any degree, if you’re on your recovery journey and finding it hard, remember that life may give you lemons at times, but you have to make lemonade.

In other words, wherever you are in your journey, remember how strong you are, and remember to lean into gratitude daily. Be grateful for the big things, but also the little things. And remember to just focus on the next step in front of you…..keep moving forward, despite the difficult times.

Love kate x

PS dont let anything dull your sparkle, and thats up to you.