Kate's Niche

I don’t write much anymore. I guess I feel like I’m done with that stage of my life. I spent a lot of time writing and reflecting and when I look over the stuff that I have written, I am very proud of the young woman I was. So insightful and so inspiring, to be honest. What has happened to that young woman? Is she gone?

No, I don’t think she has gone. I think she has grown… and changed. I spend less time reflecting now and more time doing. I’m in an action phase. Which is not to say that I don’t still need time to reflect and look deeply at certain situations. It’s actually very important to take a breather and look around and take stock of where you are in this thing called life.

But I am certainly ready for change and change is where its at right now. I’m ready for a new chapter, and I feel it coming on. I’m embarking on a new journey into eastern medicine, and I couldn’t be more passionate about this. The young woman that was so passionate about her work in mental health, has grown and changed. I feel like I have gotten what I needed from my time working in mental health. I have totally overcome the self-stigma that I felt many moons ago. I am so comfortable with my diagnosis, that in fact, I barely even think about it anymore. I know deep down that, regardless of having a mental health diagnosis, I can achieve anything I put my mind too…. And I have proven that, time and time again. I’ve moved on from that now.

Its time for brand new adventures. Its time for brand new challenges. And I’m excited for what’s coming. I have a couple of months before I begin my studies, and I am going to use that time to get healthy and balanced again. I think I have been a bit unbalanced (with food and alcohol and lack of exercise) and I have lost my mojo a bit over the past few months. I’d say this is because I’ve lost the passion for the work that I am currently doing, not to mention the fact that my romantic pursuits have gotten me absolutely nowhere. But yes. I am going to get my shit together over the next few months. Get healthy again and ready to embrace a new chapter of studying Chinese medicine and acupuncture. I’m sure this change will usher in new, positive energy.

When it comes to romantic relationships, I feel this isn’t actually the right time for that… I was trying to push for it and hope for the best, but its simply not the time.
I look forward to the day, in a few months’ time, when I can say “I am happy, healthy, balanced and READY for a new chapter” in terms of relationships. Then I’m totally sure, things will begin to present. I have total faith in that.

Right now, though. I have some serious work to do.
Wish me luck!!

I have recently been reflecting on the notion of fear and how fear impacts us in our lives. And I was working with a client today and talking about comfort zones and the benefits and pitfalls of stepping out of the zone.

Suddenly, I realised something. Fear plays very little part in my life these days. And when it does rear its head, I maintain a very healthy relationship with it. It no longer controls me or owns me. I can direct my fear and I can become friends with it.
Once upon a time, I was afraid of almost everything. I was afraid of food, terrified of gaining weight.
I was afraid of failing, yet I was afraid of succeeding. I was afraid of being alone, yet I was afraid of being around people. I was afraid of life in general and afraid of what being a part of life, meant. I was afraid of showing up.

How crippling, right?

Well I can tell you now, it was crippling. I actually still tried to live my life, but I was just afraid all the time. The one thing I had going for me I guess, was the fact that I did still try. I didn’t just curl up in a ball and retreat, even though at times that’s all I wanted to do.

So, what helped me?

Well for a start, being on the right medication and receiving the right diagnosis was helpful. And reduced some of the noise that surrounded me. I could focus and ground myself.
But then…. After I was stable, I still had A LOT of work to do. It has taken me 8 years to get to where I am today. I have had to use my courage muscles, every single day, in the gym called life, to get to where I am today. I’m now confident, empowered and happy.
When I started off on my recovery journey, I still had this fear that lingered inside me, a fear that whispered, “what if?” And not “what if” as in positive anticipation, or excitement, but “what if” as a…. “what if I fail?” kind of way. There was so much that was unexplored and unknown. And anything that is unknown, can be scary. But I think what changed for me somewhere down the line was this. I began to see the unknown as exciting instead of scary. Sure, there was still fear there, but I had the thought…. “what if things don’t go wrong…. But instead, they go right?!”

I’m going to reference a quote that I have heard:

“What if I fall????……….But, darling, what if you fly?”

And that is what happened to me (eventually)… I ended up flying. But having said that, there have been countless times where I may not have met the mark, I have struggled, endlessly, with confidence and self-esteem, but I never gave up. I just kept pushing myself, again and again and again, and I overcame a huge barrier whilst doing so. I ended up conquering the task of “not caring what people think of me”. I may have stumbled in front of people; I may have fallen. But I got back up every single time… and kept going in the direction of my dreams and aspirations.

As I kept building my courage muscles, and pushing my boundaries, I realised that nothing was impossible, as long as I continue to overcome my fears. So, I kept raising the bar. Again, and again.

I rekindled friendships and made more, I went on dates, I found love, I found a job, I found a career, I found that I had a knack for public speaking, and a story worth telling, I found myself. I found a recipe for success. All that recipe involved, was using my courage muscles consistently, facing my fears, and aiming for the stars. Things kept falling into place, things kept getting better and I kept getting stronger.

So, now I tell people, you can overcome fears. You can change your life from inside out. You can achieve things you had never dreamed of. You just have to dare to dream, and put aside your fears and take consistent action, in the direction of your dreams. You have to overcome your fear of failure and see any mistakes or stumbles as learning and personal growth. You have to learn to simply not care about the thoughts of others. You have to recognise that the only priority is you getting further along the trajectory towards where you truly want to be. Small steps are important. It’s not the fact that the steps are small that is important, the only important thing is that you take that step and those steps.

Even if you don’t believe in yourself now, you will begin to, once you start moving forward. And then you’ll be unstoppable.

Well, I’m shocked. I’m truly and utterly shocked.

This is not the way I expected to feel at this time of year.  It is not what I had hoped for.

I thought I was onto a good thing. I thought that I had a lot to look forward to.

I thought that I had someone who would be there for me through thick and thin. I didn’t think that person would be creating the hard times…. I thought they would be getting me through those hard times.

I’m trying to be grateful for what I have. I’m trying to see the positive. But I’m just sad. There is an underlying sadness that is just there right now. When will life get back to being amazing? When will life get back to being what I want it to be? Fulfilling, fun, and full of love.

I thought I had it all. The job, the apartment, the man, the friends and family. Despite all the issues I face from day to day, week to week, month to month… I thought things had panned out pretty damn well.

But now…Not only am I not at all happy with my work, I now have lost the one thing that got me through that. My partner.  I’ll keep forging ahead. I’ll keep fighting. But when will I be able to stop fighting with life, and be able to truly enjoy it?

I’m not writing this to get others down or get attention. I’m writing this, with the hope that this time next year, I can look back at these words and realize just how far I have come. I will realize that good things come to those who wait. I really hope that is the case.

Surely there are good things around the corner. Surely there is a pot of gold at the end of this wretched rainbow. Surely, it is my turn, for something good.

Thank-you to all my friends and family that have reached out to me and made me feel a little bit less alone at this time. Words cant describe how much I appreciate your kindness and support.

Warning: This blog is a tad on the negative side, but I try to end on a positive note.

I predicted this. Same as last year… around this time (the festive season) … I put on weight and start hating on myself. Because of the medication I am on, I gain weight by simply looking at unhealthy food… it does my head in. I wish I could just enjoy this time of year, like most other people, and just reside myself to the fact that I will put on a few kg’s (or in my case like 5) …over this period and I will lose it again when I get back into normal routine after the new year.
My inner critic, inner mean girl, or what I sometimes call my old nemesis, Ana (going back to when I suffered severely with anorexia), has a frigging field day at this time of year. It’s a perfect opportunity for her to yell and scream awful things at me and make me feel like shit. It really sucks because I am definitely a Christmas person… I LOVE Christmas. But having these body image and food issues really sucks the fun and joy out of this time of year…. It really is unfair. I wish things were different. I don’t think I’m alone… I think people out there that have suffered or are currently suffering from an eating disorder, can tend to feel this way too…around this time of year, in particular.

My question is… why are we so hard on ourselves? Why does putting on a little weight, ruin everything? … and how can something so superficial, suck the joy out of such a wonderful time of year? The silly thing is I don’t judge anyone else for gaining a little weight. I don’t see it as a big deal…. I believe that beauty comes from within, and that beauty doesn’t depend on whether you are a size 8, a size 12 or a size 16. But when it comes to how I feel about myself…. If I am anything bigger than a size 10, I just crumble. I pick and scrutinize endlessly, and I cannot shake the feeling that I am, in fact, the size of a house. Good ole Ana, rears her ugly head once again, and takes over my thoughts and feelings and perceptions. She literally taunts me and teases me, and self-loathing becomes my default position.

I seriously wouldn’t wish this feeling on my worst enemy. I feel like the only way to remedy this situation is to diet and lose weight. But there is that healthy part of me that just flatly refuses to do so during the Christmassy festivities. I have to at least try and enjoy myself…. I have to at least attempt to do what everyone else does at this time of year… that is to eat, drink and be merry. I just really have to work on the ‘being merry’ part.

I have decided I will go back on Jenny Craig the in the first week of January. To get back to feeling in control and so the self-loathing will be minimized. It’s the only way in terms of finding sanity around these issues. Going back on a diet and losing weight won’t fix everything in my life but at least it will quieten down my inner mean girl, or my Ana. She’s a bitch but that’s the only way to shut her up. Its sad but, unfortunately, that’s what I have to do.

I just have to get through these following 2 weeks of eating, drinking and (trying) to be merry; without completely hating myself, every second, of every minute, of every day.

I’m very conscious of not wanting to finish this post on a negative. The positive here, my friends, is that you should be so happy that you can indulge over this festive season, and not completely loathe yourselves. Be happy that the grips of an eating disorder doesn’t ruin this magical time for you. Be happy that Christmas time, for you, is a time to be jolly, and happy. I will try my absolute best to try not to let my body image issues, run the show. That’s all I can do.

Love yourself. Enjoy yourself. Merry Christmas and Happy new year 😊 May 2019 bring many blessings and magical times.

 

I had an experience today whereby I got to thinking about identity… in relation to mental health recovery. I wouldn’t at all be where I am today, had I identified myself as someone with schizoaffective disorder. I don’t think of myself as “someone with a mental illness” … and all the connotations and stigma that come along with that. I focus on the positive parts of myself; my positive qualities and I focus on where I want to be in my future. I don’t have the time or the energy to wallow in the “negative parts of myself” … that is…. I don’t have time or energy to wallow in the fact that I have a mental illness. It’s barely a blip on my radar. You see, I accept that I have a mental illness, and I accept that it can be difficult. But I don’t identify as being someone with a mental illness. I don’t get caught up in the negative “stories” that so many people become a slave to. I am Kate and I have certain unique difficulties that others may not have. But I don’t place any stigma on myself. This is the key difference between me and some others who may feel more imprisoned by their illness. My mental illness is a part of me, which I accept fully… but I don’t let that dictate what I can do or what I can’t do. I don’t let it dictate what I can or can’t achieve in my life. I see my mental illness as an asset. In a sense it has taught me how to be resilient and strong… and it has helped me achieve a sense of love and compassion for myself and others.

I think another key thing to mention is that I feel no sense of shame about my illness. Rather than feeling shamed and dis-empowered, I feel a sense of empowerment, knowing who I am and feeling a sense of pride at what I have achieved in my life so far, despite my difficulties. And, a sense of excitement in relation to what I can achieve in my future

It is all about focus. Focus on the positives and you will attract more positives. Focus on the “negatives” and you will attract more of the same. One massive piece of advice that I would give to anyone struggling with mental health difficulties is that you should not make your illness, your identity. That is one sure fire way to end up feeling dis-empowered and a slave to your illness. It is one sure-fire way to stay living and playing small.

I choose to play big. I choose to live big. No matter how difficult things become at times, I never identify with “someone with a mental illness” or “someone who struggles”. I choose to see the positive, every. Single. Time. As I have said many times… I know what I deserve. I deserve good things… as much as anyone else! So, I will focus on what can I do to achieve these good things! I will focus on my goals and aspirations, personal and professional… and I will truly feel and know that I can achieve them.

Regardless of what others may think or what society may dictate…. I can, and I will achieve and attract all the good that I deserve in life. This empowers me. This is what keeps me strong and resilient, despite going through difficult times.

I don’t think that people realise just how powerful, stigma is. It can break you. It can make the rest of your life a battle that cannot be won. If you believe it.

But this is the important part. You don’t have to believe it. That is your choice. That is up to you.

There will probably always be stigma around mental health. Don’t buy into it. Don’t let it become self-stigma and don’t let it become a self-fulfilling prophecy. You can choose…

To live big. To play big. To achieve your dreams and attract what you truly deserve.

Love Kate xxx

 

Sometimes I wonder what the point of all this is.

When struggle-town becomes more of a home than a temporary holiday destination.

I would definitely prefer to set up my mortar and bricks somewhere in Hawaii.

I often ask myself… What does it all mean? When will it get easier? What…. Is the point?

When I look at my life. I see a lot of good things. I see a lot of blessings. But it becomes easy to see that maybe sometimes the struggle can override everything that is good in the world of Kate.

The struggle makes me tired, it makes me wonder what life would be like without the consistency of the hard climb.

There a few things I have come up with. Maybe we are here to learn certain things and overcome certain obstacles. In my case, I feel like I’m doing a friggin master’s degree. But maybe this is true. My lessons and my obstacles to overcome, are all within the realm of overcoming what others think. And within the realms of overcoming judgment and moving forward, despite hardship. I am here to master the art of resilience. I can get knocked over, and over, and over again…. And I have learnt to pick myself up every. Single. Time. And I have learnt to always look… for that silver lining and see my challenges as opportunity for growth.

I have times when the struggle dissipates, and I can truly enjoy the fruits of life. But recently these times have been few and far between.

I always try to remember how lucky I am to have beautiful people in my life. I don’t take this for granted. But again, when I am challenged, even this fact ceases to make me feel much better.

Sometimes I grieve for the life I had way back when. Before things got so complicated and complex. But all I can do is brush myself off and keep going, and thanking the universe for the little wins along the way.

I’m not writing this to evoke a sense of worry in whomever reads this. There is one thing that I can assure you. I will never give up. I will never let things defeat me. I may have my days, like this one, where I have to reflect and reflect and reflect. I may have days, like this one, where I have to come to a sense of inner equilibrium. I need to fill my cup up, every so often, and just practice the art of self-love and self-compassion. Today is one of those days.

Do you know what I wish? I wish I could inspire others whom are travelling similar journeys, to keep going, to never give up, and to love and care for themselves, no matter what. This is my mission. And I will keep going and keep moving forward towards this goal. Through writing and speaking. This is when I feel so incredibly driven, and motivated and passionate… to the point where it all makes sense.

I’m going through these difficult times, and consistent battles, in order to help others follow suit. I don’t know yet how this is going to happen or what this is going to look like. But I’m excited to find out.

I know what the point of all this is.

Love Kate xx

The year, looking back… overcoming fear and stigma

What better time than now – to reflect on the past year… its challenges and triumphs.

I would have to say that the year has panned out very well and I have so many  blessings in my life now that I didn’t have before. Things have improved in many ways… but I am still consistently challenged by my mental illness and the stigma that comes along with that.

So, lets look at the positives. I have the most wonderful new abode in south Perth that fits me to a tee and I’m so happy at the end of every day when I remember that I’m going home to a beautiful, comfortable, positive space, where I can relax and fill up my cup.

I have a rekindled romance with the love of my life, Jayden. I cant tell you how happy this relationship makes me and it makes me wonder how I survived without it. I am still confident though that I made the right decision in regards to leaving this relationship 2 years ago and finding my own place in the world. We are coming back to the relationship now in a much better space.

I still have a bunch of wonderful friends… you all know who you are and thankyou to most of you for helping me celebrate my birthday last weekend. I feel so blessed to have you all in my life.

In terms of work, this continues to be challenging but I’m much happier in terms of my workplace, compared to this time last year.

I have managed to up the ante in terms of my public speaking. I no longer need to use a script when I speak. Instead I have a few palm cards that I refer to. This makes the whole process so much more enjoyable and satisfactory. I have had some wonderful opportunities with public speaking, including talking at parliament and on 6PR radio for mental health week in October. I continue to engage in talks for WAAMH trainings and may be on the lived experience speakers list for Lifeline next year!

Because I do have the odd off day, I still experience stigma because I think I am very easily misunderstood. People probably assume that I am less than others or that I am lacking in my life because of my mental health condition. The fact is though, that people don’t have the ability to step back and see me from a higher perspective. Where it is clear to see that despite difficulties, I have a wonderful, full and blessed life.

So how do I react to this stigma? Do I let it defeat me? No, not in any way, shape or form. As I spoke about in my stigma video earlier in the year, I just hold on tightly to my strength and resilience and strap myself into the ride that is mental health recovery…. In order to survive this ride, you have to hold on tight.

I read a book recently when I was on my holiday in Bali (which was amazing!). Its called “the life changing magic of not giving a fuck”. It really spoke to me and it mirrored how I actually live my life. I don’t care (or give a fuck) what people think. Sure, it hurts – or stings – when people judge me or stigmatize me. But do I let it hang me up? No. Water off a ducks back. It doesn’t affect the way I live my life or how I view myself. I will keep moving forward, no matter what.

It comes down to this.

I know what I deserve. I know that I am deserving of the best things in life. So I will not lower my expectations of what I can achieve or what I will achieve. I will always fight for what I deserve. And ya know what? Life delivers. No matter how hard things get, no matter how many people judge me or misunderstand me… I will attract the blessings I deserve. And this year is proof of that.

It has challenged me…. It still challenges me. But because I am strapped in tight, and holding onto my strength and resilience…. I will not only survive the ride, but I will thrive whilst doing so.

My name is Kate Purcell and I’m going to tell you a little bit about me and the way I live my life.

I work in mental health and I have done for 5 years. I am passionate about working in the field of mental health, but really, my passion lies in telling my story, and sharing my wisdom. Whether this is through public speaking or writing. I have a strong belief that we can all better ourselves and our situation, regardless of whether we have a mental health diagnosis or not.

In case you’re not already aware…. I have battled mental illness for the majority of my life, quite severely, up until about 8 years ago. I experienced a terrifying and trying time when I was diagnosed with anorexia nervosa at the age of 14. I was hospitalized for this and this spanned over 2 years. Anorexia is something that most people don’t understand, but I understand it intimately. It is not just about food, or weight… it is about utter self-hatred and self-loathing, and it effects the person on so many levels including the relationships they have with others. My family describe those awful years as if I was possessed by some dark force. This dark force didn’t allow me to eat; didn’t allow me to communicate properly; and didn’t even allow me to smile. I was in hell. And I never saw a glimmer of hope…. It was a very dark place to inhabit. Eventually with the right support and the right tools, I managed to find a spark of hope, but even then, recovery was hard, and arduous.
To be completely honest I don’t think I will ever be completely free of those self-loathing thoughts in relation to weight and looks. I have really good days…and pretty normal days; but I still have bad days, where food and weight consume my thoughts. The difference now is, I know that weight loss and restricting what I eat, doesn’t bring anything good, it just spirals out of control and creates more obsession and disease. I know that looks and weight don’t matter at the end of the day, and I know what is important in life. That is (to name but a few), authentic relationships, health and wellbeing, and having dreams to work towards. The other thing I’ll mention is that during my time with anorexia, I also experienced debilitating OCD, which can be quite a common pairing. As I took back the reigns of my life with eating though, I found that I had the ability to overcome my obsessions and compulsions. Things like hand washing and always being on time. I was pretty lucky I guess in that way.

After my years consumed by anorexia, I had some good times and lots of fun times. However, this involved drug taking, which essentially set me up for the next difficult stage of life. Panic attacks, depression, and social phobia were my new companions. And aside from this, I felt very disconnected from myself and the world around me. It was a confusing and frustrating time.

Eventually things improved, mildly. And then I was hit with a very lengthy episode of psychosis. All other hurdles paled in comparison to how difficult this was to get through. There was no sense of comfort and no way out. I was stuck there, for a year, in hell…. Literally. During this time, I tried to take my own life, for the second time. Although this failed to make me feel any better or reduce the pain I was in at every moment.

Then, a very strange manic experience came on, and I was in this for about 3 months. And then a mixed episode, and then full-blown schizophrenic symptoms. This all happened over the course of about a year and a half. And I’m actually surprised that I managed to get through it all. It was confusing, it was terrifying, and I was powerless to stop it. Needless to say, my immediate family had moments of almost giving up, and moments where they probably thought there was nothing anyone could do, to bring Kate back to life.

But, I am so pleased to be able to say that this was not the end of my journey. It was the beginning of a new journey. A journey back to Kate. A journey back to full-functioning and a journey back to happiness and wellness.

I have healed from my past. And my family are getting there…. They see now that I am doing so well and that helps their wounds to heal… memories will always be challenging for them though. I actually don’t get too affected by old memories, and probably some of it I’ve blocked out a little bit. All I see now is my future ahead of me. And I won’t lie to you, sometimes life is very challenging, but even the worst day is nothing compared to what I have been through in my younger years.

My struggles in the past have given me a wonderful perspective on life. I know how incredibly lucky I am to have survived everything I went through. So, I very rarely sweat the small stuff. I may scratch the paint on my car, I may have a day at work where I stuff up. But these things don’t matter… There isn’t much that phases me these days.

I have immense gratitude for everything in my life now, and I think with such gratitude there comes a level of resilience and grace in regard to how I carry myself from one day to the next. Yes, I have a diagnosis of schizoaffective disorder; yes I am on strong medication that I will be on until the day I die, and yes I still struggle with body image. But heck, I am alive, and I am in the process of living out my dreams. Slowly but surely, I will get there… regardless of how many challenging days I may have, or how many excruciating moments I may experience (I still have my moments!). I will get there. The other thing I will mention here, in relation to overcoming hurdles, is that I know that some people may not believe in me, on any given day. I know that some people still get caught up with my diagnosis and the challenges I face with that diagnosis…. But one very liberating thing that I have learnt is that it really DOES NOT MATTER what others think of you. All that matters to me is what I think of myself. And at the end of the day, I think I’m pretty frigging awesome. And the fact that I have people in my life that love me, says a lot too. I am so blessed to have a bunch of people that I can call friends, and a lovely bunch of people I can call family (even if they don’t get me). And I even have some romance in my life again now, which is absolutely lovely.

So, what are the dreams that I am working towards?  Well I’ll tell you. Although I like working in mental health, this is not the be all and end all for me. I want to speak and write (perhaps another book) and maybe even do a podcast or run my own workshops. I would like to build my DoTerra essential oils business, so I can have more time to enjoy life (working full-time isn’t for me! – and that’s ok!) and build a life that is centered around wellness and financial freedom.
I would love to travel more, I would love to get married to my soulmate and maybe even have a little mini me one day. And I just want…. To be happy.

I think they are pretty awesome goals and I’m excited to be able to work towards them!

If there are a few messages I would like you to take away today it would be these:

BE GRATEFUL! You have no idea how lucky you actually are.

You can overcome any hurdle! You have no idea how resilient you actually are.

Always be working towards your greatest dreams and aspirations… YOU ARE CAPABLE AND YOU DESERVE IT! This may require you to push outside your comfort zone, but trust me, it’s worth doing!

Who cares what others may think of you…. The only thing that truly matters is what you think of yourself. And if you don’t truly love and appreciate yourself already…. You need to work on this! Because you will have a relationship with yourself until the day you die. Make this relationship shine!

Love Kate xx

What can I say… life has been challenging to say the least, this year. But things are really looking up.

I went through an ending of sorts, about 6 months back, and I felt really sad and alone.

But with endings, come new beginnings. And I’ve beginning to see the upshot of that now.

I have rekindled romance in my life, with someone that is very special to me. I have started a new job, which is full of juicy goodness. I am working in an area I am very passionate about (youth psychosis and recovery), and I am working with an amazing bunch of people who make me laugh every day.

I am moving to a great new apartment in south Perth soon, which is in an amazing location…. And will support a healthy, happy lifestyle. I have a new car (material things don’t necessarily always make you happy, but I’m totally loving it)! And I have a holiday in Bali to look forward to in November!

Going to Bali by myself is a stretch from my comfort zone, but I think it’s a timely reminder that I deserve good things and its ok to show yourself some love and care. And its ok to walk your own path!

I am also in a much better position financially. Still a work in progress, but I have been able to learn the art of budgeting and this means I am stressing less about money in general…. Which is amazing!

I also have had some great speaking opportunities and these opportunities still keep popping up from time to time, and my employer RUAH, is still in the process of finding funding to publish my memoir.

I am beginning to see that I am so incredibly blessed. And it’s important to recognize, that (as I said earlier in the year) life has seasons. And you’re not always going to like the particular season you are in…. but change always comes, and with change, brings blessings.

Who knew 8 years ago that with a diagnosis of schizoaffective disorder came so many amazing and beautiful things!

SO MUCH GRATITUDE! xxx

What can I say… life has been challenging to say the least, this year. But things are really looking up.

I went through an ending of sorts, about 6 months back, and I felt really sad and alone.

But with endings, come new beginnings. And I’ve beginning to see the upshot of that now.

I have rekindled romance in my life, with someone that is very special to me. I have started a new job, which is full of juicy goodness. I am working in an area I am very passionate about (youth psychosis and recovery), and I am working with an amazing bunch of people who make me laugh every day.

I am moving to a great new apartment in south Perth soon, which is in an amazing location…. And will support a healthy, happy lifestyle. I have a new car (material things don’t necessarily always make you happy, but I’m totally loving it)! And I have a holiday in Bali to look forward to in November!

Going to Bali by myself is a stretch from my comfort zone, but I think it’s a timely reminder that I deserve good things and its OK to show yourself some love and care. And its OK to walk your own path!

I am also in a much better position financially. Still a work in progress, but I have been able to learn the art of budgeting and this means I am stressing less about money in general…. Which is amazing!

I also have had some great speaking opportunities and these opportunities still keep popping up from time to time, and my employer RUAH, is still in the process of finding funding to publish my memoir.

I am beginning to see that I am so incredibly blessed. And it’s important to recognize, that (as I said earlier in the year) life has seasons. And you’re not always going to like the particular season you are in…. but change always comes, and with change, brings blessings.

Who knew 8 years ago that with a diagnosis of schizoaffective disorder came so many amazing and beautiful things!

SO MUCH GRATITUDE! xxx