Hope.

• A feeling of expectation and desire for a particular thing to happen
• A feeling of trust

I’ve written a book that is in the process of getting published. Its title is ‘Hope Calling’. Now, having written a book that centers around the concept of hope, you would imagine id be an expert on the topic. And I guess I am. As far as I can remember, I have (almost) always been an advocate for hope. There is always hope, for everyone, I would say. But when we are feeling hope-less, what can we do to ramp up those positive, trusting feelings? Let us explore a little bit, by looking back on a time, where I was, without a doubt, hope-less.

During my days spent in hospital with anorexia, there was no hope. There was only darkness and suffering. I just couldn’t see a way forward, which is why it went on for so damn long. But… I still recovered. This wasn’t a miracle; it was hard work. I had to try to muster all the hope I could. Letting others hold the hope for me when I just couldn’t grasp it myself was very helpful… I definitely leaned on friends and others who were going through something similar. They saw my potential, and they saw my progress, when I just couldn’t. They saw my courageous spirit and my beauty, when I just couldn’t. They helped me to believe in myself and they helped me to see that I deserve amazing things. Which is beyond priceless.

I also had to completely re-jig my core beliefs and thought patterns. I had to re-integrate healthy core beliefs to replace the old, outdated, negative beliefs. I also needed to visualise and express the kind of life I wished to have in the future and feel excitement for the future. Slowly but surely, hope crept in, and then turned into something much bigger and brighter. What I then had in front of me, was a blank canvas, and I could start building my life the way I wanted it. But without hope, it would have all been lost. Since that time, no matter what problems I had (and there have been many), I could turn to that hopeful feeling.

Sure, there have been many times since then when I haven’t been able to see a clear way forward. But still, I could muster hope, because hey, I got through anorexia, and therefore I could get through anything. This notion has really helped me over the years, but that doesn’t mean that it has been easy to be hopeful, or that it comes naturally. It is a work in progress, and there are days where I have to work hard at it.

But generally, I like to think of myself as the eternal optimist, and I can now almost always see a positive where other people only see a negative. But it has taken years and years to get to this place. What happens when I’m up against a situation or experience though, where I can’t for the life of me, see a positive? What then? I think that the only way forward is to dig really deep, and at the very least, see the situation or experience, as learning.

I always say that even if an experience seems “bad”, that if you learnt something from it, it cancels out the negative. Learning and growing might be the only side effects from an unpleasant situation… but that is still a very good thing. And when you view things in this way, it makes it much easier to gather up all those hopeful feelings, and hence create a brighter outlook for yourself.

In summary, I would say that hope can be fickle, and elusive sometimes, but it is of the utmost importance, when it comes to living our lives. I tend to believe that without hope, we are lost beings. We must always, always, hold on to it. And when we can’t seem to grasp it, we must let others hold the light of hope for us. Friends, family, if we are lucky enough to have them, can help us see our progress, our potential, and the fact that we are indeed, deserving of our highest dreams and aspirations. So I am telling myself now too, to hold onto hopeful feelings, and trusting that I just need to keep on keeping on, and that the things that I want and desire will find their way to me. Because hey, they have before.

Love Kate xx